ENTRY XLVI | God bless

Things happen but I still fee like something’s wrong. Love shouldn’t be wrong or any sort of feelings but why do I feel like what I’m feeling is wrong already? Wrong for myself. Wrong for my poor heart whose feelings won’t ever get reciprocated.

It was my friend’s (alias: Jiyaw) birthday and she also likes you. My other friends who were also friends with her asked me to talk to you and get you to write on the cartolina that was full of greetings from different people. I wanted to do it as soon as I heard the request coz it could be another interaction with you but I was also taken aback. How could I possible ask that when I like you myself? Especially when they want you to also write an I love you. I couldn’t be selfish though.

I thought it was impossible already but when we were going to the library you were also going down. Like wow, thanks destiny. My friend nudged me. I was about to call you by your name but my friend called you Kuya already. I was like Uy, kuya, kuya daw. Then I also added Pa autograph ako. I can’t really answer you seriously like ever, lol. My friend, obliged, explained that it was for Jiyaw. You asked several questions reaffirming her identity. Gad, it’s your coursemate, how could you possibly not… You were about to get something from your bag, we thought you had a marker yourself but it turned out to be a ballpen. Lol, cutie. We handed you a marker then gad, you were so close. I didn’t know whether I should calm myself down first or talk to you. You pronounced her name wrong the first time I had to correct you while laughing at you. Hope you didn’t think I was mocking you. I actually find you really cute like every freaking time. Giggles. When you moved to my side, dang, how to breathe? I almost lost my breath, I had to distance myself. You told me that your handwriting’s ugly but I didn’t care. You insulted your handwriting more, saying it’s not readable or something but I read it straight and easily in your face.

I looked at your back as you walked away. I’m going to miss you real bad. I’m crying.






P.S: You look so adorable when you dance to the beat of the music. 

P.S2: Idk if anyone else put a God bless on their short letter for Jiyaw but we both did. Lol, nothing. Just wanna mention it for the sake of doing so.


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