ENTRY XXIV | Closer

I’ve been really into Chainsmokers’ Closer these days, I swear and you’re all I could think about.

I learned in life that I must only always expect the worst and hope for the best. I already expected that I might not see you even for a second today but hoped that you could at least show up even just for a millisecond. God gave me more than that. Destiny permitted me to feel something beyond that.

I was going to your table not because of you but the other person who’s there, the person I’m going to thank for all he has contributed to our group. I took glances at you but made sure I wasn’t appearing like I’m doing so, of course.

I went to sit in the next table and as I was sitting I saw you looking at me. You went from nothing to your big grin and even tilted your head sideways downward and I was willing to do just the same thing. Just that, I felt more than giddy already.

I went to the locker coz I just can’t keep contain myself from just sitting there taking glances at you. There were times I wasn’t sure if I saw you looking back. Oh, how I wish I had my specs on. As I went back, you looked back as soon as you felt (WELL, I THINK SO) that someone’s walking behind you. You didn’t take your eyes away and again teased me as part of your department. I answered back shaking my head. I wanted to tell you so bad, “O, how I wish I took a course from your department.”

I was more than happy. I could finally go home. And, honestly, I wanted to talk to you but I couldn’t so I just wanted to go home. I decided to ask my friends and they finally agreed. I picked up the trashes and walked to the trash bin far away. I was looking for you when you suddenly disappeared. Then, there. You were about to finish drinking from the fountain. I wanted to step back. I actually did, or so I thought but my body disobeyed me and walked straight to you (the trash bin was a feet away from the fountain). Then, we stopped and stared at each other. We grinned and I shook my head. We walked and stopped again when we were next to each other then you did that thing on my right shoulder. You tapped me hard. I almost said: Please just let your hand stay, I’m more than willing to let you. I didn’t want to take my eyes away as you did that but of course nothing last forever though it felt more than eternity.

 

 

I hope I don’t fall deeper than this, again

…but my feelings seem to escalate more rapidly than the first time, I’m afraid.

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